What Is Happiness? Exploring Its Meaning and How to Find It

Have you ever paused to ask yourself, “What is happiness, really?” In a world that often feels like a relentless pursuit of the next big thing, the true meaning of happiness can feel elusive.

This article explores what it means to be happy, moving beyond fleeting moments of joy to understand it as a deeper state of well-being, and offers practical, meaningful ways to cultivate it in your own life.

What Does It Mean to Be Happy?

When we talk about happiness, it’s easy to think of big, life-changing events – a promotion, a wedding, a dream holiday. And while those moments are certainly joyful, they don’t capture the full picture of what it means to be happy. In psychology, this emotional state is often referred to as subjective well-being (SWB), and it’s understood as something more sustained and multifaceted than just a temporary good mood 1.

Think of it less like a sudden burst of sunshine and more like the steady warmth of the sun on a pleasant day. It’s a combination of two key ingredients:

• Hedonic Well-being: This is the part we’re most familiar with. It’s about feeling good, experiencing pleasure, and enjoying life’s moments. It’s the laughter with friends, the satisfaction of a job well done, the simple pleasure of a good cup of tea 2.
• Eudaimonic Well-being: This is a deeper, more meaningful kind of happiness. It comes from having a sense of purpose, feeling connected to others, and living a life that aligns with your personal values. It’s the feeling that your life has meaning and that you are contributing to something bigger than yourself 2.

So, what is happiness? It’s the blend of these two elements – the everyday joys and the overarching sense of purpose. It’s not about being cheerful 24/7, but about building a life that is, on the whole, satisfying and meaningful to you.

Is Uninterrupted Happiness a Realistic Goal?

In a world of curated online profiles and constant pressure to be positive, it’s a fair question to ask: is happiness real, or is it just an illusion we’re all chasing? The short answer is yes, happiness is very real. It’s a genuine human emotion and a measurable psychological state.

However, the idea of happiness that is often sold to us – a state of constant, uninterrupted bliss – is not realistic. That’s a myth, and believing it can actually make finding true happiness harder. Real happiness is not the absence of negative feelings. It’s perfectly normal to feel sad, angry, or frustrated at times. In fact, these emotions are a healthy and necessary part of the human experience.

True happiness is about your overall balance of feelings and your general satisfaction with life. It’s about having the resilience to navigate the tough times and the ability to savour the good ones. It’s a skill you can build, a state you can cultivate, not a prize you win.

The Science Behind Happiness: What Psychology Tells Us

And it’s not just a philosophical question; scientists have been digging into what makes us tick, and what they’ve found is fascinating. The study of happiness has moved from the realm of philosophy to become a vibrant field of scientific inquiry, largely thanks to the rise of Positive Psychology. This branch of psychology focuses not on illness, but on what makes life worth living – on human flourishing.

To help clarify these concepts, here’s a quick breakdown of the two main types of well-being:

This distinction is important because a life focused only on hedonic pleasure can feel empty, while a life rich in eudaimonic well-being provides a deeper, more resilient form of happiness.

So, what do psychologists see as the building blocks of a happy life? One of the most influential frameworks is Martin Seligman’s PERMA model, which suggests that well-being is built on five pillars 3:

• Positive Emotion: This is about more than just smiling. It’s the ability to be optimistic and view your past, present, and future from a constructive perspective.
• Engagement: Have you ever been so absorbed in something you lose track of time? That’s ‘flow’. It’s about finding activities that challenge and absorb you.
• Relationships: Strong, positive connections are crucial. It’s about feeling supported, loved, and valued by others.
• Meaning: This is the sense that you are part of something bigger than yourself. It could be found in religion, spirituality, family, or a cause you believe in.
• Accomplishment: This is about having goals and the ambition to pursue them. It’s not just about winning, but about the sense of mastery and achievement you get from striving.

It’s also useful to know about the concept of a happiness “set point.” Research suggests that our genes play a role in our baseline level of happiness 4. While there is a genetic component to happiness, studies on twins suggest it only accounts for about 50% of the variance in life satisfaction, leaving a substantial portion influenced by individual actions and life circumstances 5. This means that while you might have a natural tendency towards a certain level, a large part of your happiness comes down to the choices you make every day. You have more control than you might think.

How to Find Happiness

If happiness is a skill, how do we learn it? The journey of finding happiness is unique to each of us, but psychological research points to several evidence-based strategies that can help. It’s not about a single secret, but about weaving a series of mindful habits and perspectives into the fabric of your daily life.

Beyond individual tips, it’s helpful to think about happiness as a practice. This involves not just doing things that make you happy, but building a life that aligns with what you value. For example, if you value community, finding happiness might involve joining a local club or volunteering. If you value creativity, it means carving out protected time for your craft. This is a core part of how to find happiness in life – by consciously designing a lifestyle that reflects who you are.

Tip #1: Cultivate Gratitude

It sounds simple, but making a conscious effort to notice and appreciate the good things in your life is one of the most powerful tools for boosting well-being.

• Try This: Keep a gratitude journal. Each evening, write down three things that went well during the day and why. They don’t have to be monumental. Maybe a colleague paid you a compliment, or you enjoyed a walk in the park. This simple act shifts your focus from what’s wrong to what’s right.

Tip #2: Nurture Social Connections

The Harvard Study of Adult Development, which has been running for over 80 years, has found that strong social relationships are the most consistent predictor of long-term happiness and health 6. Humans are social creatures, and strong, positive relationships are a cornerstone of a happy life.

• Try This: Make time for the people who lift you up. Schedule a regular call with a friend, plan a family dinner, or join a local group or club that shares your interests. It’s about quality, not quantity. Even small moments of connection can make a big difference.

Tip #3: Find Your Flow

‘Flow’ is a term coined by psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi. It describes a state of being so completely absorbed in an activity that you lose track of time. It’s that feeling of being ‘in the zone’.

• Try This: Identify activities that create this state for you. It could be painting, playing an instrument, coding, gardening, or even a challenging project at work. Carving out time for flow activities is a direct path to eudaimonic happiness.

Tip #4: Practise Mindfulness

Mindfulness is the practice of paying attention to the present moment without judgement. It helps you step out of autopilot and truly experience your life as it’s happening.

• Try This: Start with just a few minutes each day. You can use a guided meditation app or simply focus on your breath. The goal isn’t to stop your thoughts, but to observe them without getting carried away.

Tip #5: Look After Your Physical Health

The mind and body are intrinsically linked. Good physical health is a foundation for good mental health.

Physical wellbeing forms the foundation for mental health. Here’s what to focus on:

• Regular Exercise: Aim for at least 30 minutes of moderate activity most days.
• Balanced Diet: Nourish your body with a variety of whole foods.
• Sufficient Sleep: Most adults need 7-9 hours of quality sleep per night.

How to Find Happiness Within Yourself

So much of our search for happiness is focused externally – on achievements, possessions, or other people’s approval. But lasting happiness is an inside job. It’s about cultivating an inner sense of peace and self-acceptance.

One of the most profound ways to start finding happiness within yourself is through self-compassion. This means treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding you would offer a good friend when you’re having a hard time. It’s about acknowledging your struggles without judgement.

Another key is aligning your life with your values. What is happiness to you? What truly matters to you at your core? Honesty? Creativity? Security? When your daily actions reflect your deepest values, you create a powerful sense of integrity and purpose.

The Happiness Paradox: Why Chasing Happiness Can Make Us Miserable

It sounds counterintuitive, doesn’t it? But sometimes, the direct and relentless pursuit of happiness can become a source of stress itself. We can get caught in what some psychologists call the ‘happiness trap,’ where we’re so focused on feeling good that any negative emotion feels like a failure. This creates a cycle of anxiety around not being happy enough. At Therapy Central, we help clients shift their focus from chasing a feeling to building a meaningful life. The irony is that when you stop trying so hard to ‘be happy’ and instead focus on living authentically and with purpose, a genuine sense of well-being often follows.

The Connection Between Happiness and Mental Health

Sometimes, the journey to finding happiness can feel overwhelming, especially if you’re dealing with persistent low moods, anxiety, or the weight of past experiences. That’s where professional support can be invaluable. A qualified therapist can provide you with a safe, non-judgemental space to explore your feelings and develop personalised strategies for well-being.

Start Your Journey to a Happier Life

At Therapy Central, we use evidence-based approaches like Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) to help you understand the patterns of thinking and behaviour that might be holding you back. We can help you build resilience, develop coping skills, and create a life that feels more authentic and fulfilling. It’s not about finding a quick fix, but about empowering you with the tools you need for lasting change. Taking that first step can feel daunting, but it’s a sign of strength.

If you’re struggling to find your way back to a happier place, remember that you don’t have to do it alone. Change starts with talking. Contact us for a free 15 min consultation.